Tuesday, March 26, 2013

your tuesday funny

From "Feedback" in Library Journal, March 1, 2013

Weeding lessons

After reading Michael Kelley’s editorial on Melvil Dewey and weeding (“Don’t Judge a Book by Its Dust,” LJ 2/1/13, p. 8), I remembered my first library position of nearly 30 years ago. It was my first full-time librarian position, and, with diploma in hand, I was ready to be the best library media specialist the world had ever experienced. I was sure I could do it all. I joined every committee, judged and organized media fairs, and worked after school hours…. Even the classroom teachers loved me. Life was good.

Then, suddenly, I became the enemy. I didn’t know what had caused this drastic turn of events, so I decided to speak with the school principal. I told him just what I have written here, and without further discussion, he asked me to have a seat. Then he closed his office door, something he rarely did…. I was sure I was about to be fired. As I bravely held back the tears, he patted my hand, told me to relax, and spent a minute extolling me….

Before I could speak, he asked, “Have you started weeding the collection?” I had indeed been doing that. Was I not allowed to? I had learned how to perform this delicate operation in graduate school. I knew I was doing it as I had been taught, so what was wrong? My principal…said there were some things they didn’t teach you about weeding.

Here are his wise weeding ­instructions:

  1. Do not ever tell anyone—except me—that you are getting rid of library books. Every book you weed out of the collection will be someone’s favorite. They just haven’t had time to read it in the past ten years or so.
  2. Only weed books when no one else but me is in the building. Do not even trust the cleaning people; they might be informants.
  3. Schedule your weeding time with me, and I will help you carry the books to my ex-brother-in-law’s pickup.
  4. We will probably do our weeding after dark, so park your car down the street so that no one knows you are here. Dress in all-black clothing. Meet me in the back of the school by the sycamore tree.
  5. Bring a good flashlight. We don’t want to turn on the library lights; that might arouse suspicion.
  6. I will have had a large pit dug in the next county where we will bury the weeded books.
  7. When the weeding is done and someone asks for a book you have just weeded…look them in the eye and tell them that someone was seen here with a flashlight, loading books into an old pickup. They were last seen heading south.

Best advice I ever received!

—Debbie A. Ramirez, Lib. Dir., Vincennes Univ., Jasper, IN